Maise the Twit

I had abandoned my Twitter account for about three years, feeling that I had lost interest in anyone's 140-character thoughts.  Plus, Amanda Palmer and Neil Gaiman seem to be hell-bent on killing the Internet with their INCESSANT CHATTER...OH MY GOD, SHUT UP, SHUT UP, SHUT UP!!!!  I admire and respect them both, but Jesus Christ almighty!!!  Do they ever just talk on the phone or have face-to-face conversations?  Do they watch TV or go to the grocery store?  Their inner monologues are just tweeted all day and all night!  The simple answer is that I should just "unfollow" them if I don't want that much exposure to them, but I kind of enjoy marveling at how they NEVER stop Tweeting.  I sort of love to hate them at this point.

Neil and Amanda, I'm a fan.  This comes out of love.  Consider creating a "mystique."  A quiet mystique behind which fans only get the tiniest glance.  When I fall in love with someone, I don't want to know EVERYTHING about that person all at once.  I want that person to be an onion of secrets, and I can gradually peel back the layers.  Not that onions are very sexy.  I just can't really think of anything else that comes off in layers like that.  Anyway.

So yesterday I was looking back at my own limited Twitter persona, and I realized, God, I'm kind of an asshole!  Especially to poor Trent Reznor.  When I have tweeted at him, look what I've written:

Maise ‏@maisedawg7 May 09

@trent_reznor Good job riling up the Prince fans. Now they're starting to invade our blog. The rabid Weezer fans will be next, I suppose.

Maise ‏@maisedawg11 May 09

@trent_reznor I'd like to bitch about my workload. Policing my blog for anti-you trolls doesn't help. 2 hrs of overtime and counting...

(This was around the time that Trent got engaged, and because we at Places Parallel were not permitting racist nastiness to be posted on our website about Mariqueen, Iris and I started to become the scapegoat for everyone's sexual frustration and broken dreams. So I was a little frustrated.)

Maise ‏@maisedawg10 Jun 09

@trent_reznor I think you should go back to terse nin.com updates. Like one cryptic sentence every two weeks for everyone to agonize over.

(See? Mystique.)

Maise ‏@maisedawg20 Jun 09

@trent_reznor Yes, it must be HORRIBLE to gallivant around Europe in the summer, being a rock star. This office-dwelling bitch feels you.

Maise ‏@maisedawg14 Oct 09

Wow, I had forgotten what it was like to be a Twitter addict. It's not quite the same without @trent_reznor's tantrums and troll-baiting.

And I wonder why he doesn't follow me!  But he's never told me to "fuck off," either, and he even gave Iris a hug with her L'Orangerie Stank shirt on.

So I'm a trouble-maker on the Internet.  And I probably will be until I get the cease-and-desist letter.  If I ever become creatively successful, someone may just harass me in the persona of my dead chinchilla, Rollo. That's karma, but I wouldn't mind too much. She always was sassy, with a dirty mouth.

The Dresden Dolls to do D.C.

I recently received this email from the Dresden Dolls with some excellent news:

HOLA COMRADES!

we have the best news ever.

the dresden dolls are going to be playing in washington DC on the very historic night of barack obama's inauguration - january 20th, 2009 - in washington DC.

is this amazing?
this is so amazing.
you should come.

the event is going to be held at the 9:30 club, one of our favorite places to play EVER.

we are going to be on a bill with michael franti, talib kweli, the honey brothers (with adrian grenier), and jamie burke.

doors are at 8:00 PM.

the tickets cost $50.
presale is HERE
password RTV
public sale is thursday at 10 AM at www.tickets.com

let's start this new chapter of american - and world - history in style and with rock love.

AND.....
if you aren't already plugged into this (and you should be, aren't you on the obama mailing list?), the day before the inauguration (january 19th) is NATIONAL DAY of SERVICE.
gazillions of americans who run non-profit organizations are hosting events in YOUR area....and you probably have the day off.

from the site:
Every time our nation faces crisis, our national experience has shown Americans rise to the challenge. While government has an important role to play in helping rekindle our economy and addressing the problems of a distressed nation, President-elect Obama believes each of us, as Americans, have a responsibility to do what we can for our communities and fellow citizens. We are one nation.

check out the website and go do something awesome for your country on monday:
usaservice.org

this is it.

change starts now.

love
amanda & brian !

It's great to hear that Amanda and Brian will be playing together and I highly recommend anyone who is in the area or within driving distance to brave the weather and go, Go, GO! Watching Obama's inauguration and catching the Dolls all in a 24hour period...well, I can't think of a better way to spend a day.

Want to make your own Obama-ized picture like the Dolls at the top of this post, then check out Obamicon.Me. It's kinda fun. I think you have to register for an account to get it to work. It has also been picking up quiet a bit of site traffic lately so loading your picture could take a minute or two but it's still something definitely worth checking out.

Something peculiar is afoot...

Email thestrangeriswatching@gmail.com to let them know just how much you'll miss the Dresden Dolls' Amanda Palmer.

I will say no more.

--maise

P.S. Oh, and if you choose to delve into the mystery, please tell us what you find in this thread...

From Left Field...

Okay guys, we have some reviews coming up for you (soon, I promise) but first I have a little side tracked question.

They say that imitation is the sincerest form of flattery but where do you draw the line at imitation and just plain copying. This morning I was checking my email and noticed I had a friend request via MySpace. I'm all about networking for our site in any way possible but I still generally try to "know" a little bit about the people I'm adding. So I checked out this girl's site. Turns out she likes Amanda Palmer. A Lot. From her eyebrows down to her socks, her music style, and even her day job is quiet similar to the 8ft Bride living statue bit Amanda does (or did). And did I mention she's currently looking for a drummer?

As far as I can tell she's not doing this as a tribute act to the Dresden Dolls or trying to be the Australian Amanda (although some evidence points to the contrary). I mean, everyone is entitled to do their own thing and I do like her music because...well...I like Amanda Palmer, too. Please don't think I'm a bitch for calling her out because, really, I'm not trying to hate on her. It just struck me as a little curious this morning and I wondered how other people feel about this kind of thing.

Stranger Danger!

Dear Readers:

Ahhh...internet access! Our modem crapped out at home, so I was forced to spend a full 24 hours without internet access and nearly died of it. But now I am abusing internet privileges at work so that I can bring you this SPECIAL REPORT:

The Dresden Dolls' Amanda Palmer has clearly never seen Wolf Creek.

I recently received this email from the Dresden Dolls' mailing list:

To our dear dear friends in Melbourne:
Fuck hotels.
Would you like to house some starving artists for ten days? December 5-15.
Let us know!
It's going to be me + 4 members of The Danger Ensemble and we will give you free merch and tickets to the Spiegeltent up the wazoo and turn your home into an art palace. Well, that's a lie. We'll mostly be just sleeping there.
We need relatively comfy accommodations for 5 bodies.
We don't mind sharing beds, but you'd need at least 3 beds.

Wireless and tea kettle a wicked plus. We like cats. We like dogs.

We're willing to get creative.
If you know of anybody leaving town, or with a space in general that can be made hospitable for 10 days, let us know. Even more amazing would be if the space is large enough to move around and rehearse and film in. We like getting jiggy and filming.
Where? Um. The nearer to the venue the better.
The tent is at: The Arts Centre Forecourt, 100 St Kilda Rd, Melbourne. Right downtown.
Walking distance would make us so happy, but if we need to drive to the gigs, we have a van.

Um, what? Amanda, you don't know these people! What if they're serial killers or crazed fans or have a roach infestation that you don't know about until they're crawling all over you in your sleep? You can afford a hotel. Or a hostel, even. Oh wait, maybe that's not such a good idea either.

Have you told your mom about this plan? I can't imagine she would approve.

In the meantime, if certain male rock stars need a place to stay while on tour, I would happily offer up my humble abode. Iris can attest that my couches are the most comfy in the Midwest. Just send me an email at tragicmaise@yahoo.com along with a resume and headshot. Must like dogs.